I am in love with Mr. Lindstrom, my science teacher. I found out where he lives and every night I perch on a tree branch outside his bedroom window and watch him sleep. He sleeps in his underwear: Fruit of the Loom, size 34.

Owl Tycho, the shape-shifting daughter of "simple witches", is a high school student by day and owl by night. When her nightly vigil over her science teacher is interrupted by the appearance of a mysterious, starving, wild-eyed boy and the inept behavior of a new owl, she soon finds her affections beginning to shift.