“I'm living through the ugly.”

I've done it this time. I've really screwed up. I've made a mistake, and I'm afraid that it's going to cost me everything – my family, my career and most importantly, Emmett Sinclair. He saw the beauty inside of me, looked past what I was becoming on the outside, and gave me his trust. Everyone thinks I tried to kill myself; I think I made a mistake. They all say I'm halfway to the grave; I say I've been reborn. Nobody knows what I'm going through, so I'm going to have to fight harder than ever before. The problem is, I no longer know exactly what it is I'm fighting for.